Our Fascination with Suffering

Last night, I saw The Hunger Games at AMC's Summer Night program. What it is is AMC brings back 6 or 7 big movies to replay for 3 nights a week in July and August. Best part: $3 tickets. It was a lot of fun. The week before, I saw The Amazing Spider-Man. The week before that was Dark Knight Rises, which I didn't attend. After watching The Hunger Games again for the first time in more than a year, I started thinking. (That's never good.) Why is my generation so obsessed with The Hunger Games? Why do we enjoy watching totalitarian governments abuse and destroy human beings? What is the draw? We can't relate to it - we've never been torn away from our families and forced to fight to the death. We don't live in shacks, and we don't have to hunt game to keep from starving. Why does our generation devour it so greedily?

My mom said it was due to us being raised on violent media. That is true. We are desensitized as a whole. We play video and computer games, watch movies, and hear news stories filled with graphic violence. However, if you talk to the average American teenager, I doubt they would say they want to see a murder take place outside their bedroom window. The question remains then, why does The Hunger Games speak so loudly to us?


Constantly being controlled by outside forces

I have another idea. It is fear of being out of control. Katniss (the protagonist of THG) lives in the poorest district of her country. Her father died in a work-related accident, and her mother suffers from depression. She has been thrown into a pretty rough life, and this is before she is shipped off to fight against 23 of her peers in a death-trap of an arena. The whole time, Katniss is struggling to take charge of her fate. "May the odds be ever in your favor" is not a reassuring phrase. She doesn't want to be controlled by "the odds," by the government, by her mentor, by the sponsors, by a relationship, or by other forces that appear over the course of Catching Fire and Mockingjay. Her short life has always been defined by outside events, and she is constantly battling against them. In the end, she must be in control for her to be happy. Ultimately, she does place herself in a situation where she is always in control, even if it isn't always for the best. (I don't want to say too much about the epilogue, even though I could go on for a while.)

Okay, so the average millennial is afraid of being out of control. We could go one step further and say that it is a fear of the unknown. As a group, we have everything. We have food, water, education, air conditioning, cell phones, iPods, cars, Burger King, Angry Birds, and even whole industries that wait on us hand and foot. We are protected from violence (I know that there is terrible violence in some homes and neighborhoods, but I am generalizing), we are protected from want, and sometimes even protected from work! We're afraid of poverty because we wouldn't know how to behave or survive. (Let's be real - if your average suburban teenager was placed in The Hunger Games, it would not end well for them.) It's the unknown and unfamiliar that scares us.

Revolution: the blackout changed us

Apocalypse movies and TV shows are rampant. We are afraid of pollution and using up our resources (After Earth, Elysium, Wall-E, Firefly, Revolution, Oblivion), of epidemics (World War Z, Contagion, any other zombie movie ever), of unexpected attack (Pacific Rim, Falling Skies, Red Dawn, Apollo 18, Pretty Little Liars), and even our own desires (Secret Life of the American Teenager, Juno, Hannibal). We are afraid of things beyond our control, that we don't know and cannot know. Think about the traumatic events of the last decade or so. We have had terrorist attacks, natural disasters, swine flu scare, and an economic collapse. All of those things come out of the blue, and children/teens have no way to emotionally prepare for them. Our enemies have not been countries we can identify and prepare to defend ourselves against. Of course we are afraid of the unknown, of chance, or of helplessness. We have felt this way, and Hollywood and New York respond to those feelings.

I feel that the perfect example of this is Pretty Little Liars, a show on ABC Family.

AttAcked by the unknown

Four regular teenage girls are thrust into a world of fear when their best friend suddenly goes missing (and is killed). They are haunted by "A," the unknown tormentor and hoarder of their secrets. A sees everything and is not afraid of hurting - or killing - those who get in her way. To the rest of their world in a idyllic American suburb, they are just strange, but they are being targeted and emotionally (sometimes physically) harmed through the texts and actions of someone they do not know.

Before I mentioned The Amazing Spider-Man and The Dark Knight Rises. Could we list all of the superhero movies that have been released in the last couple years? Iron Man, Iron Man 2, Iron Man 3, The Dark Knight, The Dark Knight Rises, Thor, The Incredible Hulk, Captain America, The Avengers, X-Men Origins: Wolverine, The Green Hornet, X-Men: First Class, Green Lantern, Man of Steel, and we have Wolverine and Thor: A Dark World coming out this year. Those are only a few of the many superhero movies that have been released recently. Why is this genre so successful now? Don't get me wrong, I enjoy superhero movies, but there is only so much one can do with a superhero film. The hero has a bit of self-discovery, and then saves mankind from a perilous teeter on the edge of oblivion.

Super strength and super morals

Our generation is looking for a hero. We want to believe that there is a person who can defend us from the unknown and unexpected. We are looking for someone stronger than we are, someone with superpowers, whether it be super strength, time travelling abilities, magic, or ridiculous intelligence to protect us. We want to know that when General Zod comes from space, Superman will be there. We want to be able to sleep knowing that if Daleks come, the Doctor will be there too. We want to believe that if there is a serial killer in the night, Sherlock Holmes will find him. The unknown and uncontrollable terrifies us, and we want to believe in Something Bigger, Someone in control. If only our generation understood what they were asking. Some of us already know the answer.

Deer in the Headlights

There is another deer on the side of the road, slaughtered by its own daring. I imagine that it stood at the edge of the wood, eyeing the trees on the other side of the concrete river with longing. It saw the deer across feasting on flowers that seemed unending. That yellow line must be the boundary into a magical world. The poor thing must have begun to envy the way man envies. Like a Shakespearean tragic hero, he felt the tide of jealousy well up inside of him.

He must have the neighboring kingdom. He would stop at nothing to preside majestically over both realms. Why should he stop on this side of the stone creek? Even though the fast creatures with the bright yellow eyes came tearing down the smooth, grey surface, nothing would hold our hero back. He resolved to do what others warned against.

He knew it was possible to cross the road – he had seen it done. He has seen others rise to the challenge and complete it successfully. He is just as powerful as they are, just as strong, if not more so. He thought of his accomplishments, his women, his children, his territory. They are impressive by any standard. He had the record of excellence, why should he fear?

I believe that he stepped out into the road, not in a panic as he should have, but with his chest out before him. I believe that he did not look to see if one of those frightening beasts was racing toward him. I believe that he had forgotten reality in the moment of his self-validation. If only the prophets had warned the deer that pride cometh before a fall.

As a man going into debt, seeking the hand of a lover, or pursuing the ever elusive power and popularity, this buck sauntered onto the cement with his head held high, looking at those on the opposite side with contempt. Basking in the quickly oncoming light, he smirked in a self-satisfied way. It was all so easy.

The Sister Question

Those of you who know me well know that I have brothers, and no sisters. I am the only female child of my parents. I am also the oldest, so I got to hope each time one of the boys was born that I might FINALLY get a sister. Ehh... I love my brothers, and I wouldn't trade them for girls.

Still, I have sisters. How, you may ask? Friends, Young Women, and little ones. I have to say that it is an honor to be able to interact with these beautiful girls.

I can't say that I know exactly what it's like to have biological sisters - I don't. But, these girls give me purpose. I have to set an example of what a young lady is - graceful, classy, motivated, kindhearted, do-ers. This means that I have to work. I have to develop myself into what I know those girls can be. It is a challenge for me.

I learn what I can from the older girls. I watch them (and idolize them, actually). The way that they behave impacts me SO MUCH. I want to like the things they like, and act the way they act. I'll admit it - there are times when I change what I'm doing because of them. This is what little sisters do. I don't know if these older girls will ever know how much I look up to them.

It is interesting to be a girl in this world. It is hard being placed under constant pressure to be "hot" and "sexy," or "strong" and "independent," or "refined" and "flawless." Basically, to be perfect. This pressure from the World is a lot.

 

The Sisterhood is consistently under attack. It doesn't only make us insecure about ourselves, but it makes us competitive with one another. This should push us in the opposite direction. We should be hanging on even tighter to each other. We should gather to stand in opposition to the World's ideals. This gathering is happening. I've seen it occur over and over again. Every time a girl walks into a room, smiling and confident, dressed appropriately for the situation. Every time I see a girl sitting by herself be greeted by a group of friends. Every time a young woman decides to dedicate herself to her education for self-betterment and the ability to serve others and educate her children. Every time a girl decides to work towards what "real woman" is: kind, virtuous, educated,  confident, classy, willing to love and serve, with "deep beauty" reflected on her face. (Check out "A Beauty Secret from a Boy" to learn what "deep beauty" is.) As we help one another become this kind of person, the Sisterhood is strengthened.

There is nothing so fulfilling as hearing a young woman you love and admire say "You're like a sister to me." Thank you for letting me be a small part of your life. Thank you for giving me the great honor of having you in my life. Thank you for your remarkable example. I love you!

A Beauty Secret from a Boy

I had an experience the other day. I was sitting there, talking to one of my guy friends, and he suddenly said something that surprised me. He said, "(Name of girl) is getting less pretty." It came out of nowhere. This guy is one of the sweetest young men I know. Plus, he was talking about a girl who I think is very pretty. I've often wished that I looked more like her. Now, when I responded with a startled "What?", he explained. "Her countenance. Her countenance has totally changed. She used to be a pretty good-looking girl, but she's changed. Countenance is at least 20% of a girl's attractiveness."

Wow. This was coming from a young man I totally respect. He has high standards and is a good example to me. His opinion is one I value. Countenance is at least a FIFTH of a girl's attractiveness?! Dude. This isn't something that I read in a book or heard in a conference talk. This is something that was said to me by a worthy priesthood holder. If that isn't enough reason to carry yourself with confidence, than I'm not sure what else you need.

What is this "countenance?" Dictionary.com says that a countenance is "someone's face or expression." In Mormonland, it means something more along the lines of "spirit" or (I hate to say it) "aura". We believe that every single person is born with the "light of Christ", or what the world calls a "conscience" or "moral compass". It's a guide to prompt people do the things that are right. By the actions we take, we can either brighten or dull the light of Christ within each of us. (P.S. The Holy Spirit is a constant companion to those who have entered into a covenant with Christ, not to be confused with the light of Christ.) When you see someone who has done something good or joyful, people may describe their looks as "glowing". THAT's their countenance.

Simply put, you can see someone's spiritual health in their countenance. It's that light in their eye and the sparkle in their easy smile. Of course, that doesn't mean we should go around judging people by how glittery their eyes are. You can tell when someone is happy and following the commandments of God. My friend is one of these people who is trying his best to do what he needs to. He is a teenage boy, so of course physical beauty is a factor in a girl's attractiveness, as well as how fun the person is, and how well they can actually converse. But at LEAST a fifth of a girl's attractiveness is what Sister Dalton calls "deep beauty".

"I was reminded of my divine identity, and I learned about what I now call “deep beauty”—the kind of beauty that shines from the inside out. It is the kind of beauty that cannot be painted on, surgically created, or purchased. It is the kind of beauty that doesn’t wash off. It is spiritual attractiveness. Deep beauty springs from virtue. It is the beauty of being chaste and morally clean. It is the kind of beauty that you see in the eyes of virtuous women like your mother and grandmother. It is a beauty that is earned through faith, repentance, and honoring covenants."

Wow! As young women, we are always told to look for a worthy priesthood holder, a spiritual partner, for a husband. We want a husband who can see our deep beauty, because that means he loves us for all of us, inside and out, what we are and who we can become. In order to attract that kind of boy, we have to do the things listed by Sister Dalton. She continues:

"The world places so much emphasis on physical attractiveness and would have you believe that you are to look like the elusive model on the cover of a magazine. The Lord would tell you that you are each uniquely beautiful. When you are virtuous, chaste, and morally clean, your inner beauty glows in your eyes and in your face. My grandfather used to say, “If you live close to God and His infinite grace—you won’t have to tell, it will show in your face.” When you are worthy of the companionship of the Holy Ghost, you are confident and your inner beauty shines brightly. And so “let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God; and … the Holy Ghost shall be thy constant companion.”

There's our countenance we were talking about. It's true what they say about inner beauty. Your potential is divine and royal. Those young men whom you wish to spend time with will recognize that, and help you develop it. You, in return, will be a motivation and support for their development. They will agree with Sister Dalton when she said:

"Develop deep beauty. There is no more beautiful sight than a young woman who glows with the light of the Spirit, who is confident and courageous because she is virtuous."

Click HERE for a great video using a lot of the quotes I used, as well as a link to the full talk.

Think about it.


(Credit where credit is due: Elaine S. Dalton "Remember Who You Are!" April 2010. And of course, to my wonderful friend who inspired me to write this piece. Thanks, kiddo.)

World Travel.

I'm very sure ships could be sinking mid-way along kindly made glaciers. I never sway from eating little lunches because it upsets mom. Snakes yield other unfortunate attributes, even queasy bodily kinks. Girls always adore turkeys under the kiwi kayak. Pretty Indians sell new banging, blue buttons. Lice can't vex minor singers in brutally evil ticklish places. Ruling monarchs canNot stop jewel thieves. Buff guys hate eating non-cooked pancakes. Virginians go silly for golf. Can elephants pounce bouncy castles and undo party bags? Even lost toys attack many wilting military men needing cold strawberry slushies. Cool swag guys go before girls secret lovers' lies. Catching burning fires gets to be nasty 'cause every single person goes. Entreat doves' every sailing kind until days run circularly calling cool adoring rain. Angels never stop attending little sweet baby zebras zealously miracles till bravely retiring. Colors unite sails of ambrosia at midnight.

I'm Jordan, and Iraq, 'cause Iran to Afghanistan. <3


Where the Heck is Matt?

Gendercide - Real or Imagined?

What is gendercide? It is killing someone based on their gender. Simple, right? Yes. Totally horrible, right? Yes. Not an issue today, right? Wrong. Gendercide is a serious issue that most people don't seem to realize is there. We don't hear about it much in the US, but it's definitely happening. This goes back to abortion and child welfare. Sorry for repetition.

I love diverse cultures. I love studying them, learning their customs, eating their food (especially eating their food.). But there is in some cultures a dated and incorrect practice - devaluing women and girls as burdens to the family. Girls are unwanted. The cultures require a dowry to be paid to the man that marries the daughter of the family. They place financial stress on a already struggling family. "A study of a Mumbai (Bombay) clinic found that 7,999 out of 8,000 aborted [children] were female. In families where food is scarce, girls ages 1-5 were 43% more likely than boys to die of hunger or malnutrition, according to another study," (James M. Rubenstein). While girls create a burden, boys create opportunity for financial gain. They can get higher paying work, as well as marry for a dowry. It is an awful practice that must be stopped.

Abortion. Giving the child lowest priority when it comes to eating. Abandoning babies. Having sex change operations when the child is an infant. WHAT KIND OF WORLD IS THIS?? It is the world we live in. Gendercide is a real problem. We should not ignore this as an "imagined crisis" or a "cultural custom". It is evil. We are looking for the Lost Girls that will never be found. Life is precious. We cannot afford to treat it like it is something that we can recycle.

A lack of women leads to another problem. Sex trafficking becomes more and more prevalent as the gender ratio difference gets larger and larger. We're talking about kidnapping and selling GIRLS into prostitution! This is all linked to the idea that we are smarter than we really are. That we can bend the laws of nature, limiting each couple to one child. I guess they forgot about the cultural variable in their equation. We are HUMANS. We are not all-knowing (even if some of us seem to think so). Let's please STOP trying to control the minuet details in other people's lives. It isn't only that it's girls that they're killling. It's that they are taking AGENCY and the FREEDOM TO CHOOSE from both the child they are killing and the parents they are regulating. This comes down to human rights. What has God given us as humans. Even if you don't believe in God, is slavery wrong? Is murder wrong? Is torture wrong? In forcing abortions/sterilization on those women who WANT to have more than one child, they are committing every one of these crimes.

All Girls Allowed is a foundation that is focusing on ending the gendercide caused by the One-Child Policy in China.

http://www.youtube.com/user/AllGirlsAllowed?feature=watch#p/u/1/OScOV2MPZiM

This is what I mean about being "pro-life". It's not just about abortion. It's about defending LIFE, physical and spiritual, from whatever may attempt to destroy it.

Think about it.

In The Battle Of The Mind I Will Take My Stand.

So.... Something I've been thinking about a lot lately: the Battle. Not just any battle, but the Battle between good and evil, the Battle that we fight every day. The reason I've been thinking about this is that I've been reading the war chapters in Alma/Helaman the last couple weeks. One thing I've noticed this time through is that they do more preparing than actual fighting. They are always "strengthening their cities" and "building fortifications". It's good stuff. I do believe that the stories in the scriptures are lessons for our day, and although we may not be in hand to hand combat or worrying that our cities will be attacked by Lamanites, we can still learn from them. Here are some of the things I learned:

First off, what kind of battles do we fight?
We have battles everyday, fighting things from our own tempers to discouragement to temptations. To get personal, my battles are more along the lines of fighting discouragement or frustration. Some people battle things that are more looming, such as homosexuality or drug abuse. Still, every battle is equally important, because if you lose, your spirituality is at stake - and that's everything.

How do we prepare for these battles?
In the scriptures, the preparation involved digging ditches, building towers, erecting walls, and training soldiers. In our day, the things we do to prepare for our battles involve following our "program of strict training", as Sister Dalton put it, and doing things such as attending church and seminary, reading the scriptures and praying continually, living the standards in For the Strength of Youth (No matter what age you are), and being an example to others. The more we adhere to our training program, the more prepared we will be to fight off daily temptations and frustrations. It is a battle in itself to stick to the program- the World can look very appealing. But we know Who will win this battle. We must remember that the second battle the Stripling Warriors fought, none were lost, but many were severely wounded. We will make it out, but that doesn't mean it will be easy.

Below is a song that goes with this theme. It is a song written for the guys, but it is just as applicable to the girls as well. :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y-fUlZkri_g

Thanks for reading!
God bless,
S